You Look So Serious...

This life, well, it's the only one we've been given.
As much as I hate the phrase, there is great truth behind yolo.
We have one life, one shot at making something of ourselves and for ourselves in this crazy place, one shot at creating our dreams and living to make us happy.
And so why do we hide behind pretences and insecurities?

All you need is 20 seconds of courage.
That's all you need to go and do something amazing.
Because if you don't, if you sit here wondering what it would be like, you're missing out.
Longing for something, or someone, is useless if you're not willing to act on it.
Dreaming of accomplishments isn't worth anything if you're not willing to go out there and make things happen.

Because we have one shot at this.
We have one chance to prove to ourselves, not everyone else (though that does come), but to ourselves, that we are capable of immeasurably inspiring things.

So please, get up!
Get up and dance and sing and cry and yell and smile!

Life is too short,
too short for anything except happiness,
too short not to take risks,
too short not to love,
too short not to be inspired
and too short not to go out there and get what you want.
What you work hard for.

Life is too short to whine and complain.
Inspire me, my dears.
Inspire yourselves.

I challenge you. This coming year, put all your difficulties and all the reasons why you can't behind you. Do it with me. Make your resolution to inspire yourself. To work hard and to smile and be that someone who never slows down. The one who seems to make everything possible. Not because it's easy, but because they are able to pick themselves up again and again and keep going. Make your dreams a reality.

- xx, Kelly.

I Think You And I Should Meet...

I've realized things today, and in the past few days, that are reassuring.

In the beginning I missed you so much. It had been a year in which I can remember sleeping in your bed, in your arms, more often than my own. It was comfortable, it was easy, and it felt right.

You were good to me even when I was less than perfect. I struggled with things beyond your control, with issues I couldn't just forget about. And even though you said I should just move on, forget and be happy, I couldn't. That was okay though. You stayed and made me smile, made me laugh and held me tight.

All those silly little things you did for me, the little notes and messages, the photos that would appear, the CDs I would find hidden days later… these things showed a side of you I hadn't known, a side I loved to see. The creativity and sneaky nature of your little gifts was my favourite part. I still keep these things, the notes, and specifically the message you wrote me on my phone - one of the many late nights you stayed with me until I could fall asleep.

You are an extremely special and talented person, and I'm so grateful I got to know you the way I did. You are talented, smart, and stubborn. I wont ever forget the nights we sat talking about things for no reason other than to hear each others voices. The songs you played for me and how you encouraged me to sing. Something I love to do, but hate to be heard doing. Your patience and ability to listen and truly not judge is amazing.

And though I could never ask for a better way to have spent that year, I am happy to see you moving on.

We were right for each other for the time in our lives, but it was not meant to be forever. We lead very different lives, with different goals and conflicting opinions.

I want you to be happy and I realize I can't be the one there by your side when you do what you need to, to accomplish this. I know I can't offer you everything you need and that someone else, another very lucky girl, will be able to. It isn't easy, but nothing in life is. You will find the girl who compliments you, who loves you and understands you and makes you smile in ways I never could. And that is okay.

I'm excited for you. Because I know you feel the same way for me. We were not meant to be together for any longer than we were. But that doesn't mean it wasn't worth it.

Thank you for everything you taught me, for helping me see what I can be and for surprising me the way you did.

Whomever I end up with will be very different from you, but I hope they share some similar traits. I hope they are witty, driven, intelligent, passionate, and are able to surprise me and make me laugh like you could. I hope they can handle spending as much time in my company as you could, and that they keep me on my toes. Because even though I get bored easily, you did a good job of keeping me alert and catching me when I least expected it.

Thank you my dear. You have been and will continue to be one of my best friends.

- xx, K.

By The Fire, Sitting, Waiting...

I find myself getting repetitive, and that is why I have been writing less lately.

I can't help it right now, though, because I can't stop thinking this. Why is it that we are so confused. I feel as though I know what I want one day, and the next it's all up in the air. Emotions are cruel, cruel things. The feeling of being alone, being all by yourself and depending on no one is something so easy, so straightforward and so entirely possible. Until you remember, or you learn, the feeling of having someone to fall back on. Until you feel what it is like to be all by yourself, to be a big girl, but to have someone watching over your shoulder, just in case.

It makes sense that they say we all look for someone who reminds us of our fathers or mothers. They are the epitome of safety; they are our backbone and our little cheering squad at the end of the day. No matter what happens, they are there for you because you are theirs. And they love you. They love you and care for you no matter what happens.

Listening to stories of people who have been together for 50 year, so close and so loving and so happy, are both exciting and terrifying in my eyes. The idea of finding someone who is so totally committed, so loving and so willing to work through life's difficulties is almost overwhelming. Their strength and their trust is admirable and inspiring.

So here's to hoping I'm capable of this. To hoping I'm able to stop pushing people away for long enough to find someone special.  To hoping they are the one I'm meant to spend forever with. To hoping for love, true and pure and immovable.

- xx, K.

Made Of Starlight...

There is something striking about a single key. For a while now I've had a sort of fascination with keys, specifically those without a set purpose - skeleton keys. At first no one understood why, then it became somewhat of a trend, and now that this trend is passing I'm still here, intrigued. There are so many possibilities and so many meanings behind a simple key. To look at something so ordinary and understand that it has infinite potential allows your mind to wander and your creativity to be set free. A key signifies so much condensed power; those who hold the key - to happiness, to love, to health or something as simple as the key to the front door - hold on to something powerful. Without this tiny object each is lost.

For almost four years now I have worn a key around my neck every day. I get little comments and questions about what the key belongs to. Some as if it is the key to my heart, others ask if I misplace my house key often enough to wear it on a necklace. I smile and laugh, and respond politely. This key is a skeleton key. It belongs to anything I decide it should. It is the key to my heart, the key to my happiness, the key to my success, patience, loyalty, understanding.. the key to my whole self. This key holds more symbolic importance in it's tiny features than you could even begin imagine. And so when I am asked if I ever take it off the answer is simple - no.

I carry it with me to remind me of the power I hold. I am the creator of my fate and my future and I am responsible for the direction my life takes. I dictate my own happiness and success in how much I put into my life and I am responsible for myself. It is so easy to rely on others to make us happy, but it is important to remind ourselves that if we cannot be happy alone and in our own skin we are losing control.

To hand over a key which possesses such importance and power should not be done lightly and without much consideration. And even when it is appropriate to share these things, it is crucial to remember we must always be responsible for holding this key close to our hearts. Because if we do not, there isn't another person who will hold your key nearer to them than their own - and the last thing one wants is to misplace something so important, so personal, so special.

- xx, K.